From An Ache For Family
by Johanna Night
Summary: (Family) fam·i·ly: noun- A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade. One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement. Hades has never had a genuine family, and maybe it's all he ever wanted.


All Hades ever wanted was a genuine family.

* * *

Hades will never know what to think.

It's a typical god of the underworld thing, Demeter will say, but that's not true. He's not sure what's true anymore. His family doesn't believe in him. He's got no one but himself.

He's happy with it.

Who knows? Maybe he could have had a better life like people say. Maybe he could've just chosen the sky instead of the underworld and been ruler instead of his younger brother. Maybe he could've been a hero, somebody people actually worshipped and adored. But for now, he is content on being nobody.

That is, until Percy Jackson comes. He is a child of Poseidon, of course, because they have never kept their oaths. Then he remembers Nico and Bianca, locked up in the Lotus Hotel, and he doesn't feel any better. Anger fills him as he remembers what Zeus did, and he is glad that Poseidon and he have always been on decent terms.

Sure, there's an occasional threat. But nothing too serious and the sea God understands that. Hades is happy to have a brother that actually treats him like one, actually treats him like he mildly belongs. It's gratifying. Because no one has ever treated him as such.

The war approaches and he is so, so tempted to just watch and never help. Because what have the gods done for him? What have the gods done for him, Hades, who guards their dead and watches their lovers souls? Because what have to God's done that it's actually bright?

He's not sure of that, either.

Persephone isn't sure what to think of the child. On one hand, she says to him one night, he could be a valuable 'weapon' for the war. But on the other, he could destroy the world. And the risk is just too great to run.

He visits the child, promising Perseus a quick death. Poseidon will be furious, no doubt, but Hades has no doubt he will get over it. The gods have never cared about their children, and the God of the Underworld fears his brother is no different.

He walks in with the intention of nothing but murder. Because, in his mind, if the child lands in Zeus's hands….there is no possibility of a quick death. Zeus would be furious—and again, forgetting his own daughter Thalia, would jump into action. 'Only for the best,' He convinces himself.

The child is innocent.

That is what stops him in the end, those green eyes so alike his father's. He beams up at Hades without recognition, his tiny toddler mouth curving into a grin. Hades raises his hands, and Percy waves his hands. Those eyes stare into his, innocent and trusting.

He drops his hands. If anyone dared to call him a coward they would be dead and buried in a matter of seconds, but he can't do it. If he does he will be just like Zeus, and the thought of being like his brother repulses him to the very edge of his being. Hades drops his hands and turns away.

Poseidon never finds out.

* * *

The child is twelve when he sends Alecto after him. He has a reputation to uphold, and so he commands the bird to attack with the intention of injuring, but not killing. Poseidon will be equally furious.

He chooses his reputation over his brother.

The camp finds him the day after, and he watches as Zeus send the Minotaur after him. For an instant he grieves for the child, because no hero would ever survive without training. And to his shame, the second thought that comes to his mind is 'maybe then Poseidon will join me.'

He is turning into an Olympian.

His helm goes missing the day after, and when he discovers the theft Hades goes crazy. The Underworld explodes in chaos, and of course Zeus, safe up on Olympus, doesn't know a thing. Hades finds that Zeus's bolt has been stolen only when he is blamed.

Poseidon comes to him, almost in tears. He is still bitter towards the God of the Underworld for hurting his son, but Zeus is his main priority. "Hades," He begs, clutching his trident like it is his lifeline. "How do I save him?" And Hades knows that this is a whole different matter that Poseidon cares for this demigod more than he can ever say.

Unfortunately, this time Hades does not have an answer.

He watches from the depths of the earth as Zeus blames Poseidon's son, and he watches as Perseus Jackson accepts the quest. Maybe, possibly, he can survive, but even Poseidon know the chances are slim. And both of them know the demigod is not the thief.

Zeus comes to visit him, all lighting and flashes and drama. His blue eyes spark with endless fury and Hades wonders when they came to this. "Return my bolt," He says in a voice so low it is almost inaudible. "Or you shall taste my wrath."

Hades suppresses a snarky comment and instead rolls his eyes. "I don't have it," He insists, but Zeus holds firm. His little brother has always been stubborn, but this to him is going too far. Since when have they resorted to killing each other?

He keeps an emotionless facade. Eternally he is dismayed.

For when has his family come to this? For when has his relatives resorted to accusing without evidence; to turning against blood for selfish gain? And deep inside him he knows it has always been this way, and he was just too foolish to see it.

For blood does not mean family, just as family is not always by blood.

Persephone perches on her throne of petals, spending days and days with him tracking the demigod's progress. He knows she feels the same but she is not like him. She is not an outcast; she is not the blood in a field of roses.

She is not, and he is.

* * *

Poseidon finds him a year later. Perseus is almost fourteen now, and Artemis has disappeared. The sea God is frantic, his hands wringing in desperation when he tells Hades that his son has fallen in love. And Hades watches as Poseidon's son rushes across the country, and he knows Poseidon is right.

His own son Nico is but a little boy, naive and inexperienced and believing. It pains him to see the boy so happy, so happy that Percy is going for Bianca and joyful with the prospect of her coming back alive. And in that moment he is furious, furious at Artemis for breaking another family.

As if her father breaking Maria wasn't quite enough.

It was never her intention, and that is the only reason Hades lets it go. Because he is not evil and he will see reason, and the fact that his niece is currently under the sky worries him despite himself. Bianca is her huntress, and without her mistress she would be lost.

And Hades knows his daughter wants a family. Nico, just being Nico, isn't a family-no matter how hard he tries. And a family is a group who accepts you, a group who loves you for what you are. Children of Hades and Hades himself have never had a family.

Then Bianca is dead and Hades doesn't know what to think, because she was supposed to live a long long life full of everything she could've ever wanted. And the broken look on Percy's face makes him think maybe he's the only one who understands, because he too has let someone down.

He feels Bianca's soul drift to the underworld, and he sees her for the last time at Charon's ferry. She does not know who he is, and he does not tell her. To end her life like this would be terrible, and so he walks past and forces himself to not look back.

Nico realizes it too.

He watches his son pace and pace in the forest, twisting his fingers around. "She swore," he mutters, and he convinces himself it's not true. For in his life nothing has gone bad, and everything is perfect. For his life has not grown worse.

Then Percy returns and Nico runs, and even the God of the Dead cannot track where he is. And when he finally does, it is too late, as Nico has fallen under the influence of Minos himself; the treacherous judge he was forced to admit.

And Nico, the innocent child he cradled in his arms, is gone; running far far away as all his children have wanted to do in the past.

Nico wants to be free, and Hades cannot blame him.

* * *

The boy is powerful; the first in history to ever best a god.

Especially a god like him. He understands true weakness, true vulnerability when Riptide is at his throat, the point digging uncomfortably into his skin. For an unknown reason he is almost glad Percy escaped.

But that doesn't say the Son of Poseidon wouldn't hurt him. Instead, the demigod glares and grabs a fistful of his robe. "Just because I'm a nice guy," He snarls, "I'll let you go. But first tell me about that trap!"

The god takes the cowardly way out. He disappears.

If you call Hades a coward, he will cast you to Tartarus. But The Lord of the Underworld is afraid of his nephew. Because if needed, he has a family-And Hades does not.

* * *

It is after the Giant war that Hades finally realizes the meaning of family. He is watching the demigods dance, their arms thrown around each other in celebration, and watching Percy and Annabeth press their lips together over and over in joyous reunion.

"You guys are my family," Leo says in that elfish way of his that only the son of Hephaestus can pull off, and Hades smiles faintly in the shadows.

And just like that, Percy and Annabeth whip around, their hands flying to the weapons. They should not be able to sense him but they do, and Percy's features relax. His hand drops away from his sword, and maybe inside Hades is a little relieved as he does not want a repeat of the River Styx.

"Lord Hades," Annabeth bows respectfully, and Percy catches his wince. A sheepish smile from the demigod tells him Perseus knows exactly what he feels, and instead of a bow or even a nod he grasps the god's hand.

Percy's hand is warm in comparison to his ice cold one. "Come on," The Son of Poseidon beckons to the group, which is frozen in stunned silence. No doubt they are wondering why Hades has not blasted him yet, and he makes to leave. Percy's grip grows tighter. "Join us. The more the merrier, right guys?"

Everyone murmurs assent and they gather together, and then and only then does Hades see the glances Nico casts at the Son of Poseidon, the almost wistful look in his eyes when he talks to him. And for once The Lord of the Dead doesn't judge, because Nico needs a family just like him.

He pulls his son aside and the terror in his eyes shows it all. "I understand," Hades says, and that is all that is enough.

They rejoin the group, Percy looking worriedly in their direction, but finally he drops his gaze. "How is it like in the Underworld?" Percy asks, sipping his drink a couple minutes later. The Lord of the Dead shrugs uncomfortably, because what can he say? It is the underworld. No description.

He fumbles for a subject; no one has ever made small talk with him once in his life besides Hestia, and she is immortal.

"Did you hear about the time Nico ran through a cactus patch?" he asks finally, and Nico turns a shade of red never before seen.

"Dad!" He shouts, mortified, and Hades doesn't notice anything except that his son has called him dad.

"It was the field of Punishment," he explains, and Percy laughs. "He was chasing a spirit and he ran right into it." And he laughs too. The demigods stare at him like he has dropped from Olympus, but Percy only shakes his head.

"Typical Death Breath," He says, and the table roars with laughter. "Toast?" He offers, raising his cup. Hades hopes Apollo hasn't spiked the drinks. "To family!"

And Perseus smiles at him warmly, and Hades raises his own glass. The demigods smile and this time it is real, and Hades has never felt so wanted in the split second their glasses clink together.

* * *

(Family) fam·i·ly: noun- A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade. One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement.

And perhaps Percy Jackson is his family. And maybe, just maybe, the demigod can fix the void in his heart; the one his blood family has neglected to heal.

**A/N: Thanks for reading! I do not own PJO or the definition of family. Yes, that definition is the definition of friend. Sue me. Again thanks for reading!**

**~Johanna**


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